If I Stayed

There are a few people from my life that I miss so badly it makes me want to hide away somewhere so I’d never have to get close to anyone ever again. That way I wouldn’t have to relive the hurt of losing someone. I don’t mean people who have passed away, those dear to…

A New Water Challenge

In the past, I have challenged myself to realize the importance of water. I made efforts to be as conservative with my water usage to understand more of what it is like to not have access to it when I needed it. This challenge is a bit different. I am participating in Lent, a Catholic…

Water Challenge

Here in my video, Water Challenge, I talk about doing something quite unique. My next few blogs are going to be specific to the water challenge itself. I sort of feel like if more people would take this challenge, whether it be for a week or a month, people would grow an awareness of what…

Leap Second


This Saturday will be longer than any day you have experienced in the past 3 years. No, not because your in-laws are visiting.

There will be 1 second added to the night before July 1st in order to be in perfect aligning with time. It has come to pass that the earth has slowed down……… a super tiny bit but still.

Why? Because of a couple of reasons. First, the lunar pull of the tides has taken its toll. Second, the atomic clock which timekeepers use to.. keep time.. is a teens, weensy, tad bit fast. So, we get an extra 2 milliseconds a day.. and it’s been that way for 100 years. So, ever so often, time catches up with us and we have built upon an extra SECOND!

But, given the small influence the seconds are having, timekeepers have met recently to discuss the significance of said second. They decided they need to evaluate ONE MORE leap second to properly determine its value to mankind.. time.. and space.

Be prepared, people. This could be one of the last leap seconds you will ever experience. Use it wisely!

What do you think of the leap second? Do you think there will ever be any sort of impact to our technology or lives if we were to kick it to the curb? I’m not sure but you know what they say about a butterfly flapping its wings across the globe…

It’s an interesting thought of nothing else. Let me know what you think!

Why Dad’s Acceptance, or lack of, Is Important


Today is Father’s Day, a time of love and bonding between father and child. Some of us do not have this luxury and, of course, there are long lasting impacts because of it. Now, there is research letting us in on why.

I was drawn to this because I wanted to see how much of it applied to me since I never knew my dad. I was ready to use myself as a test subject against the outcome of the study. This article I read was about a research study that was comprised of several studies taking place over many years all over the globe. It analyzed the relationship that children have with their parents. What they found was that, more than anything, rejection from the parents – specifically dad – was the biggest factor of the developing personality.

Why dad? It appears that most often dad has the strongest sense of power in the family dynamic. Even though the child spends more time with mom, dad’s words last longer and seem to be more important.

The biggest personality qualities linked to rejection are hostility, low self esteem, negativity, personality issues.

So how did this add up to me? It seems like everything added up pretty well.

I have a lot of hostility and anger towards my dad for not having been apart of my life or getting to know me. It’s sad to know that half of the reason I’m here never got to see me smile, laugh, cry, fall off my bike, dressed for my first dance, get my license, start college.. etc. I had a terrible childhood as well and always thought that maybe if he knew he could have fixed it. When I was in foster care, I asked to go live with him but he didn’t want me. Unfortunately, no bond will ever be between us because he passed away when I was 15. To this day, it angers me that this is lost to me forever. I would have been such a daddy’s little girl and we would have had a fantastic bond. Now, that will never be. Did I mention I am up for adoption? 🙂

Low Self Esteem
I have had a low self esteem for quite a long time. I was made fun of a lot in middle school which added to that. I know a lot of people go through that but it was pretty bad for me. While I was picked on at school, I would go home and have an even more challenging time. There was no safe haven. This just made me fall into a pit of despair which is hard to get out of. I used to be uncertain that it would ever end and had a hard time seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. This made me feel pretty low about myself. I was always poked fun at by my own mother for being chubby which had a lot to do with her. She’s chubby too but always felt the need to poke fun at me for it. I feel better about myself now but still super self conscious even though I’d like to not be.

I do try to not be negative but it is a constant struggle for me. I have to consciously choose to be positive. In order to achieve this, I have a 10 minute morning meditation where I focus on being positive, my goals, and being happy. I feel like I accidently attract negativity. So if one unfortunate event occurs, it can easily send me down the dark hallway of sadness. I have to fight it. Luckily, I’ve become adept to this rainy cloud and learned how to put up my umbrella. I do strive to always be positive.

Personality Issues
I have these, too. For many years I was unbelievably shy. I would excuse myself from excessively social situations because I could not handle it. This has evolved into just anti social behavior. Many people link these together as if they were one in the same. This is not the case. Being shy is like having a door in front of you with a window. You can see the interactions taking place amongst your peers and you want badly to go and be in it with them. No matter how hard you try though, you just can’t seem to open the door and get involved. Being anti social is no longer caring and reading a book instead. I was always told I’d grow out of being shy in high school but I never did. I no longer mind not being in the midst of chatter.

With all these personal discoveries in comparison to the findings, I have realized how much not having my dad has impacted me. Sure, these traits can easily be from other things. But it is interesting to see that people across the world have the same traits after having a similar experience. Knowing that my personality was molded this much by a lack of a father figure is humbling. I had no idea how much of me was shaped by this.

What about you? Do these personality variances resonate within you? Do you have the opposite reaction because of a great bond you had with your father? Or, do you have none of these and still have no father figure to attribute it to? Let me know, I’d like to learn more from the general populous on their experiences.

Father’s Day!


As you are probably aware, Sunday is Father’s Day! Most of the US is doing something in relation to their fathers, celebrating the life and relationship they have crafted over years.

Then there are people like me who have never celebrated it and have no experience with it. I never knew my father so instead, I took the opportunity to find out what people do around the world to honor their fathers.

Father’s Day started in the states around 1910. It took until 1972 to get it a legal holiday! Now it’s a time we cherish, but we’re not the only ones. In this video, I explore the Philippines, Brazil, Thailand, Taiwan, Germany, and Iran. Some are very similar, some are quite not, and it might surprise you which is which.

What are your Father’s Day traditions? I’d love to hear from anyone who celebrates the holiday!



As you may have heard, PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) has found a new medium by which to gain your attention and give you a message.

That medium would be the porn industry. Their new website, PETA.xxx, is meant to draw you in. They use the idea that sex sells to get people to see the wrongs being committed against animals and how you should be vegetarian.

In case you are unaware, PETA has a very controversial role in American culture (I’m not sure if PETA exists the same as it does here in other countries). They will throw red paint on your fur coat or have a smear campaign in the press if you wear real leather. Their tactics are well documented. Many people have a strong opinion of them, either love or hate. Many people agree with their message but don’t appreciate the way they go about getting the word out. From my experience, when you throw your opinions/beliefs/feelings in people’s faces, you don’t get a welcoming hug. It can be viewed as offensive how they go about their business and therefore people don’t want to hear what they have to say – no matter how relevant and true it is.

The truth actually is quite important. Animals are very mistreated by their caretakers and big corporations such as Tyson exploit them. I saw a documentary recently about how the chickens are kept in dark spaces and are not allowed to be outside. This is sad to me. Just because they are going to be eaten doesn’t mean we should treat them so terribly. I have seen sick cows being chained and dragged by forklift into a warehouse where it will be taken to the slaughter house. I have seen chickens that have been fed so many hormones that they are unable to walk and just get fat. The list goes on and on. It’s almost a scary thought to eat meat if you don’t know where it’s from or how it is treated. I wish something could be done to ensure this is not reality for the animals.

With this being said, I understand why PETA gets so heated. There is a lot there to be angry about. People do need to be aware of what’s going on with the food they eat. No one should turn a blind eye towards anything that is suffering.

This is why the website makes sense. There is not anything seriously inappropriate on the XXX website. The most naked thing on there was half a butt. The private parts are covered with signs such as “You can have too much sex…….. spay and neuter your cats and dogs!”. Under the “Hardcore Videos” tab, there are videos of animals being mistreated such as an elephant being beaten with a rod. People perhaps going to the website to look at free porn will soon find out that that is not at all what the website is about.

Have you been? Do you agree with PETA and their ways of spreading the word?

Bloomberg NYC Soda Ban


Mayor of NYC, Bloomberg, wants to cap out the size of sugary drinks to 16oz. This video is my thoughts behind the issue and comparison solutions.

I have no problem with there being a regulation on the amount of bad we put in our body…… as long as there is something on the other side of that coin. If you are going to limit what we can get with our money, there should be incentives towards healthier options. Being healthy comes at a price unfortunately. People buy these terribly unhealthy beverages and foot products because of the price. When you can pay quarters for an enormous amount of liquids that taste good, you will do it if you’re budget dictates the need for it.

I wished that eating nutritionally was as cheap as eating terribly. A processed double cheese burger at McDonalds cost $1. The healthier chicken sandwich is closer to $5. Those struggling financially have to make that choice.

The obesity problem here is deeper than our beverages, it’s a financial issue. I know I have issues related to wheat. Eating gluten free is a strain on my budget at times. When money is tight, I have to decide whether I want to eat what’s best for my body or have enough gas in the tank. I hate that I have to make that decision.

Why can’t unhealthy foods be the more expensive stuff? I’m not sure how we got to the food prices the way we have them now. Processed foods are easier and quicker therefore cost efficient. Healthy options take more time and care therefore necessitating the higher price. Even so, I wish it weren’t this way. The most we can hope for I suppose is to have the finances so we can do what’s best for our body without having to concern ourselves about the wallet.